Surviving Grandparenthood

Hello again friends and welcome to “The Over 50 Corner”!

I think that I am pretty sure that, most of us are grandparents.  Am I right?

Now, take a moment and think back…did your grandparents treat you in the same manner you treat your grandkids?  Probably not, as their world was totally different than the world of today.

Their world was more stable.  Not much worry about global warming,  child molesters or crime in our neighborhoods.  We played outside with our friends until dark, rode our bikes without helmets and stood up in the back seat of our parent’s car without seatbelts!  And we survived!!  Yet, I would want to believe they loved us in the same manner we love our grandkids.

(In my case, my grandparents were not very loving individuals as they were “old” at the age of 60 and possibly just waiting for the “last bell to ring”.)

With this generation change came the different method of bringing up our own kids. It’s now an electronic age and artificial intelligence!  Our generation has a hard time setting up the DVR and “our” ways are from the age of the slide-rule.   Now, we see our children raising their kids with their own beliefs, thinking that their way is better.  It is their right to do it their way in the same manner that we thought it was our right to raise them, our way.

Should we give them our opinion on parenting?  Sure, but in a careful and loving manner.  (Not me…I was too strict.  I’ll let grandmom do it!)  Should it be, “Do as I do!” or “Do as I say!”?  My daughter always told me, “I’m not going to raise my kids the same way you do!” (and she isn’t!) My granddaughters have much more leeway than what I gave my kids.  Her home, her kids, her rules!

Yet, it’s true that when M. and I take the grand girls out, we spoil them a bit (not too much) and that’s not a bad thing.  I guess that’s expected of us as we don’t see them as often as we would like.  We try to plan a getaway jaunt with them every summer to do something or go somewhere their parents or paternal grandparents haven’t done or gone with them. Just something new!  We “try” to adjust to their “style” but, we find ourselves modernizing and easing up on our way of parenting, as not to disrupt our relationship.

Granddaughter #1 is now a teenager whose interests do not include spending too much time with grandparents. (We’ve been replaced, for the time being, by an iPad and iPhone) I must admit, I wasn’t too thrilled having to tag along when my parents visited my grandparents either!  Somewhere down the line, they’ll come back!  (She better make it quick ’cause, I’m not getting any younger!)  Granddaughter #2 remains accessible and agreeable to our visit or visiting us although, Grandmom is the main attraction.

We always make ourselves available to “child sit” whenever possible, as the distance between our homes makes it a 3 hour drive and an overnight minimum visit. But, as M. and I have lives of our own, when we can’t…we can’t.

So, if you live close to your kids, they might want you to stop what you are doing and babysit at a moment’s notice.  You have your own life to live so, if you’re busy or the timing is not right, don’t feel bad in saying “No”.  I can guarantee you, there will be many more times you will be asked.  You can also request advanced notice, too!

So, being a grandparent is not only a blessing but, a challenge as well!  Just how you meet that challenge will determine how you will be remembered.  Just love them and they will reciprocate in their own way!

Good luck!

Till next time, I’ll be here waiting for you at “The Over 50 Corner”!

Invite your friends to tag along with you on your next visit!

Take care !

Fred

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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